RAGS!!<\/p>\n
Once upon a time there was a man who was publicly offending a village elder:
\n– You\u2019re an atheist! You\u2019re drinker! Almost a thief! you are useless!
\nThe village elder just smiled in response.
\nOne young man dressed in the silk trousers watching that scene asked the village elder:
\n– How can you tolerate such offences? Do you not feel hurt? are you not a man enough to fight your attacker? What example are you giving us young people?
\nThe village elder smiled again and told the young people:
\n– Let\u2019s go with me. <\/p>\n
The young man followed him to the dusty lumber-room. The old man lighted the kin-dling and began rummaging in the trunk, where he found a completely worthless tattered robe, dirty and smelly. He threw it to the young man and told him:
\n– Try it, it will match you. <\/p>\n
The young man took the robe, looked at it and resented:
\n– What these dirty rags are for? I am well dressed, and you must be crazy! \u2013 and threw a robe back.
\n– You see, – the old man said, – you did not want to try rags. Similarly, I did not want to try those dirty words that man threw me.
\nTo be aggrieved by offenses means to try on rags someone throw us. The young man was left speechless.<\/p>\n
LESSON<\/p>\n
I know it\u2019s much easier for me to tell you to stop taking things so personally than it is to actually stop taking things so personally. Still, there are ways to thicken your skin and enjoy life with more happiness and less contention and hurt feelings.
\nTell yourself the person who is the potential offender has as much right to his opinion as you do to yours. Besides, they\u2019re only words. What can words do? They certainly can\u2019t break my bones! <\/p>\n
Remember, the reason we usually feel offended is because of the meaning we attach to what is said or done: \u201cThat means he really doesn\u2019t care!\u201d \u201cShe\u2019s saying I am no good!\u201d \u201cI knew he didn\u2019t really love me!\u201d \u201cShe wouldn\u2019t say that if she was \u2026\u201d And so the internal interpretation goes.<\/p>\n
So simply re -frame it. Talk yourself out of the offense by telling yourself: \u201cThis person is simply expressing his opinion, and listen to how interesting it is! I find it so fascinating that someone can have such opinions that are almost the exact opposite of mine!\u201d<\/p>\n
You will be happier as you learn to talk yourself out of offense and internalize the sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but-words-will-never-hurt-me philosophy of communication. Dear friends, you are already properly dressed. Why allow somebody’s rags to spoil your day?????<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
RAGS!! Once upon a time there was a man who was publicly offending a village elder: – You\u2019re an atheist! You\u2019re drinker! Almost a thief! you are useless! The village elder just smiled in response. One young man dressed in…<\/span><\/p>\n